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Absolution

Last night I cried all the way through dinner.

The awful issue of the impending 50th birthday was raised again. Nothing has been done. No decision. Apaprently now everybody is too terrified of not getting it right (so doing nothing is better?), not enough time (sorry, I'll try to do more than 49 years run up next time) no money (tho seemingly money for other things, other people's birthdays) and whatever. Apparently I'm a very difficult person to do anything for. More like everybody's gotten very accustomed to being spoon fed over the last few years. I plan, do and sometimes finance quite a bit. That's OK, I am good at planning and organising, everybody has their strengths and should play to them.

I have been asked lots of times by a few people, what I want to doooooooo. I have answered, made lots of suggestions. None of it was arranged. Fair enough.

I've been made to feel that I'm just too much trouble. It's all too much effort. That I'm a problem. Well, enough of that! I don't wish to be made to feel that I am the cause of so much pain and trauma to some of you. I don't want to keep on being distressed.

So you are all absolved. You need do nothing.

I'm glad I sorted that out.

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maitressep
Call me Madam

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