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May 7th, 2019

May. 7th, 2019

Somebody who shall remain nameless said "Show some largesse and allow the mere mortals to try to ape the goddess, it shows that you were doing great things in the first place". It made me laugh! I'm no goddess, I'm a very ordinary lady. Oh wait, no I'm not. otherwise why would people copy what I do or suggest, and superimpose it all on another relationship :)

From holiday ideas, to fetish clubs, to vintage fairs, to groupon cocktails, to sex fantasies and gay clubs, they have all been systematically criticised and vilified, and then taken and copycatted. I wonder if she has to dress up like me too?

Interestingly, an article on narcissism arrived in my mailbox yesterday. I first brought this up with him back in 2007. Yesterday's article was so absolutely bang on the nose, exactly what he's doing, and the outcomes, that it made me shiver. I first tried to tackle this with him back in 2007. People see and use narcissism as an insult. It isn't. It is a mental health condition. No, you cannot make it go away with nice long walks and chats with mates. It needs to be addressed. Not addressing it is a choice. However, it also means you will keep doing the same things with the same result, leaving a trail of heartbreak and disappointment in your wake. Again.

He has been very lucky with me. I haven't walked away, and I haven't ceased to love. I have stuck by him, through a huge multitude of things that would have slain all but the very strongest women. But instead of seeing me as the greatest of allies, he sees somebody he needs to compete with and subjugate. My refusal to be compliant and obedient is not viewed with admiration, it grates and grinds, because he thinks it's something he should "win". He can't help it, and this isn't a criticism, it's a comment. As always, nothing on the table for me in terms of security, and he's not learning. They key is so simple!

In spite of five bargain bucket easter eggs last week, I've dropped some weight! Did a great gym session yesterday, and popped Mission Impossible again. Hell, I'm still fat, but I'm getting fitter and stronger all the time. I also took some sexy underwear back, because I don't have to prove a single thing to anybody. And I started house tidying for the imminent arrival of Nix n Tiff on Friday. This brings me BIG JOY!!!!!


Call me Madam

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