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December 1st, 2017

Lucky Lucky Lucky

So today was 100% win.

Same ole shitty commute, but I was quick on nabbing the seats.

Great lunch with a work colleague, who also did a good training sesh for me and the team.

A three course meal for £12.95 in the West End. OK, so not gourmet, but feel the value. And all perfectly edible. I've been to Andalucia a few times now, and it's great value. But now, a Korean BBQ noodle spicy shit place has opened up next door, bwahahahaha!

Venus in Fur was great. I am not going to say anything about it as I know several friends have yet to go. But I loved it. I also appreciate the seat upgrade for my entire group, even though we purchased on a discount :)

And then into Planet Hollywood for a cheeky after drink.I am old enough to remember the glorious heyday of this place, in it's original venue with John Wales and Mark Miller. Many a glory glory night. Not so now. It's grubby and touristy. A shame, but everything changes. Not unpleasant really, but not like the olden dayze.

Lovely to spend a Christmassy night out with the gang before I vamoose to Oz next week. Really enjoyed myself.

Home, to find boo has left a bloody lovely Ralph Lauren leopard print dress on my chair.

Very happy!


This morning, as I was getting out of bed, I felt a massive bang in my right calf, like the worst cramp ever. Which I wish it had been, but unfortunately I have a torn muscle of some sort. So that's a month to four months. I can barely walk, and it's exceedingly painful.

So, that has pretty much ruined my Oz holiday. I won't be walking much, and we fly in 6 days, so it's unlikely to be significantly better by then. I am absolutely gutted, I had so many wonderful plans already made, by me, and others. I will do what I can and absolutely make the best of it of course. But it's more than a bit screwed.

Tomorrow night I am supposed to be going to an Army ball with Rod. I have my dress already, and my hair, nails and make up appointments all booked. I'll have to make a decision on that in the morning, but I hate letting people down. I'll go if I possibly can, and just sit a lot I suppose.

I have been crying most of today, and feeling very low indeed.
Every year I think next year is gonna be my year. But it never was!

I did years of Rod's lying and constant infidelity. Always thinking it would change, but of course, it never did. He got older and more desperate, I got older and wiser. We are friends, and I appreciate him a great deal. I enjoy his company. But this will be the first Christmas I've spent as a singleton in 11 years, and I will wake up alone. But not thinking maybe he'll stop the performing circus he needs to travel on, so there are plusses and minuses.

I also have no firm plans for NYE, having been let down. First time ever I think!

My calf is shit-on-a-stick, and all I can think about at the moment is it's potentially ruining the Oz trip. I may take a few extra days in Adelaide, where the weather is better. If you can't move much, you may as well be somewhere sunny! But I have 3-4 more days to ponder that, possibly longer.

In 2018 I will launch myself on the dating scene. I already know there's a queue waiting for me, but I won't be taking any shite on board. The 6 month breathing space has given me time to sort out in my head, what I am looking for. Hopefully this will put most of the chaffe off.

I would still want to be somebody's something very special.

I will not tolerate lying and cheating.

I may or may not live with somebody again.

I am still sexually active!

I do still want to club and party, albeit not several times a night these days.

I'm still a perv, and looking forward to getting back in the saddle again :)

Lots more. But for now, I'd just settle for being able to walk!!!

Really am trying not to get too despondent. I try so hard, and yet get fucked over by whatever.


Call me Madam

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