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On Saturday, after getting home, with a hangover, I cancelled my hair appointment, eschewed the gym, and had a nanna nap. For far too long, didn't wake up til almost 7pm, arghhhh. This meant I could spend til 2am diddling away on the PC, doing some serious research into Koh Samui accommodation. There are some super little places out there, pretty luxurious, for around £150 for a week! It's made me look forward to it that little bit more. I may even extend a couple of days at those prices. It's nice having no agenda and being able to suit yourself in regards to everything. Yeah, it's a bit daunting to be doing Istanbul, Bangkok and the islands alone, but I think everything's gonna be ok.

Sunday, went into London on the train with Debs, and did Brick Lane and Shoreditch, with a couple of bottles of wine thrown in for good luck. had dinner street stylee, was delish! And finished off in the Red Cow's beer garden with a bottle of Prossecco. Really lovely, simple day out, lots laffs and chatter, all good.

Sunday evening, boo arrived in a huff, telling me his life was shit and I was part of the problem. I calmly told him he was the architect of his own problems, and that he was responsible for having to move out due to his continual lying and cheating. And he was responsible for the vast quantities of stuff he'd hoarded and was having to move. Anybody and everybody's fault but his own as always. Not my problem, I was just offering to help, I don't want to see him upset or unhappy. But by then, the damage was done, and I ended up crying in the lounge. I put The Book Thief on Netflix, which is a wonderful film, and lost myself in that. And this morning he took me to the station as I was late up. Things just carry on, although he does seem more geared up towards moving now.

It's hard, when you genuinely love somebody, to see them in any sort of mental turmoil. But he doesn't worry about me being upset, he certainly was never bothered about the devastating effect all the lying and cheating had on me. And he's not overly concerned about my emotional welfare now. That's not a criticism, it's just the way he is. I am still fully aware that this will take months, if not longer, to get out of my system.

Comments

( 1 comment — Leave a comment )
demi_x
Aug. 22nd, 2016 08:23 pm (UTC)
glad you are seeing things clearly now x
( 1 comment — Leave a comment )

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maitressep
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