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Aug. 18th, 2017

S and I have exchanged over 250 emails in the last 2 days. I will probably come across as full of myself tomorrow, but I'm not, I am awash with doubts and fears. It's only a date you might say, but it's the first one I've been on in over 11 years. And I didn't want to be in this position. I just am.

There aren't any negatives, he's been absolutely lovely. It's been such a huge change, and perhaps that is maybe what's making me fretful. Rod was like that in the beginning.

Perhaps it's too soon and I should wait for Rod to leave and be by myself for a while.

Perhaps I've made the wrong decision.

Perhaps I should just be on my own full stop.

Anyway, best foot forward, only one way to find out.

Comments

( 1 comment — Leave a comment )
tntnikkibint
Aug. 19th, 2017 02:11 am (UTC)
Jump in. Feet first, hair wild, and screaming with delight. Don't ever wait for tomorrow when an opportunity presents today.
( 1 comment — Leave a comment )

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maitressep
Call me Madam

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